5 Years Later It's Still So Clear

5 years ago we had just moved into this house. Before I was fully awake on the morning of the 11th I remember thinking "The date today is 9-1-1. Emergency. How odd." I had never thought of the date of September 11th as anything odd or significant before that moment.

I got up just after thinking that (pretty early) because I was having a new refrigerator delivered early that morning. Aaron was at work. Ramsey who was almost 4 and Maren who was 19 months were still sleeping. I turned on the Today show from the very beginning that morning and was watching live as the reports of the first plane crash came on.

When they reported a second plane had crashed, I knew it wasn't accidental and actually began to panic. I called Aaron at work and they were all still unaware that anything had happened, so I ordered him to turn on the news to see. I remember next I called my MIL and told her to do the same.

That entire morning is still so clear to me. The delivery guys watched TV with me in my living room. Complete strangers to me, yet not really. You know? I held my babies and cried most of that day.

Yesterday and this morning I finally decided to tell my big girls what it means when people talk about 9/11. They were amazed. They were scared. They were affected by it. This morning I asked questions about what we talked about yesterday, and they remembered everything I'd told them, so I told them more. And I cried. And Ramsey did too but she doesn't know that I saw her. I told them that during morning prayers at school today I am sure the principal would ask them for a moment of silence to honor and pray for the importance of this day and all the lives affected by it, and I wanted them to really understand and take it all very seriously.